22nd
What does it mean to be "open-minded"?
My mother thinks my brother and I are closed-minded. While MM, my mother and myself were at lunch the other day, she said as much. MM wholeheartedly agreed with her. Not only did he want to impress my mama, but this was also verbatim of something he had said to me before. My mother says Nathan is “frustrating” and “exasperating”. She finds his views to be non-inclusive and warped to his own specific worldview — a very liberal, privileged worldview. As I have thought about this recently, and read this post, I see what she is saying.
To be open-minded is to be considerate of all people — even staunch conservatives. MM’s main gripe with me (on this topic, ha) is that I choose a stance and refuse to budge, I refuse to consider another’s viewpoint. I argue and pontificate and become obnoxiously verbose (not at all surprising). The issues I throw my passion and my weight behind usually have to do with women’s rights, reproductive rights, equality, misogyny, sexism and racism. Though my opinion has been formed over the years by me informing myself, he still thinks there’s always a middle ground to be found and I typically am too hard-headed and stubborn — closed-minded — to attempt to understand another’s viewpoint. I believe my mother feels the same way. She feels Nathan writes off those who are not as well-read as him, not as smart as him, not as liberal as him. He and I both struggle with losing our religion and that is a bone of contention.
At lunch that day, my mother discussed some AM radio show she had recently listened to, a religious show, and they were discussing Christopher Hitchens and his book God Is Not Great. The man on the radio had a debate with Hitchens about who is more open-minded: Atheists or Christians (or something, the details are sketchy) and the religious man said he was because while he had faith in the Lord, he and most Christians questioned the existence and validity of God and the Bible. Questioning one’s faith is a typical exercise, so they, as opposed to Atheists who definitively believe there is not God, are more open-minded. And maybe it’s because I think my mother’s awesome, I have to agree that that makes sense.
In truth, I really believe that to be open-minded is to be open to all people and lifestyles. I must be open-minded because I support: gay marriage, reproductive freedoms, abortion, alternative lifestyles, equality for all citizens, universal healthcare, equal pay, etc. I believe that we all deserve the same advantages in life, but I also believe that people who do not agree with me on all these things really suck (for lack of a better word). As I have many, many Republican and Christian friends, I do not think they are ignorant, I just sometimes think: oh, well they are just not as compassionate or evolved as me … if they really knew about all the injustices that go on, they would agree with me. Which, frankly, is bullshit. Republicans are not all bloviating idiots, and Christians are not all disillusioned ninnies.
When young people, such as all of us, pick a progressive opinion, they decide that they are in some way: “better”. Correct me if I’m wrong… I really see this with my brother. Nathan thinks he’s better than me because he rarely watches television, reads a book a day, and listens to Classical music. He is not “better” — I was born first. But I digress, be proud of you views, but do not look down on those who disagree with you if they are informed and intelligent and can support why they feel the way they do. Some of the best debates/conversations I’ve ever had have been with my very intelligent, conservative friends.
Being more accepting and open-minded means being more tolerant and understanding of those who have completely divergent views than you — even those who dislike Obama for no good reason (guess what? they might not be racist for not liking him. shocking!). Now if someone is stupid though, or worse: vapid, I have no interest in considering them.